Post by deadmeow on Jul 13, 2006 11:58:56 GMT -5
UMAggiesJJ
Posted On 04/17/02 03:41AM
Week 6 in Review!
-How did Pitt and Kansas squeeze out wins?
-Feisty Syracuse battles to the end.
-The....the....Cardinal w- wo- wo- wo.....
Week 6 was basically a regular week. Crazy things happened. There was a last second 4th down flop pass, a team which was down by 18 twice, came back twice, and still lost, a game where 59 points were scored in the 3rd quarter, 58 were scored in the first half, and only 8 were scored in the 4th, and lastly a game which featured so many turnovers, bad play calls, and missed opportunities, we thought it was CSPAN's repeat of Election 2000.
"CARDIAC CATS FROM NORTH GET HEART TRANSPLANT BEFORE CARDIAC CATS FROM SOUTH, LINCOLN CHEERS"
1-Pitt: 17
Clemson: 13
We Said: Pitt
As firsthand spectators to this game, we expected pitt to be able to control the clemson offense and take advanatage of the speed-problems and holes in the clemson defense to muster a sufficient vicotry. Pitt, however made this win harder than doing a rhomboid binary function. In a 7-7 game nearing hlaf, Pitt elects not to kick a FG. Clemson repeated 4th down attempts dididnt hlep their cause either. In the end the tigers were reduced to being raped by a group of albino panthers. Down 13-10 with no time left, they *went for the win* from 15 yards out rather then settle for the automatic tie to keep their top ranking. And we thought Gerald Ford was the dumb...
"HE WHO'S SHIT WEIGHS MORE, LAUGHS LAST, LOSES TOO."
2-Kansas: 40
4-Colorado: 39
We Said: Colorado
This one started with Kansas leading buffaloes in a herd to the slaughter with the precision of an american cowboy. With the score 22-7 in the 2nd the buffaloes realized that yes, they outweigh a jawhawk by more then the 3 pounds the jayhawaks originally convinved them, and they rebeled. Colo took a 29-22 lead in the 3rd, picked off Kansas at midfield, and was poised to end the game. And then, those fucking birds launched their dive-bombing attack, their defense shitting on every Colo attempt to score. Kansas led 40-29, and picked Colo off twice in a row. Only 2 minutes were left.
Wait, NO GAME is a Colorado game unless Colorado shows us once again how they can score 50 points in a 1 minute span. They scored, and it was 40-37. The Buffdaloes had finally figured out that buffalo shit, indeed, was much larger than jayhawk shit. However, those birds would get the last shit. They took a safety with 15 seconds left, and Colorado ran outta time. Buffalo Wings, anyone?
"EATING AN ORANGE FROM NEW YORK IS *ASKING* FOR A NATURAL DISASTER..."
3-Miami: 57
Syracuse: 51
We Said: Miami
At the end of the 1st, Miami led 29-8. And then in something you might expect in Babylon 5 episode, Syravcuse reverted to a more boring, unsophistocated, predictable offense then dripping water: They used 1 play. They also went for every 4th down. Result: Not only did they get 4 scores of 80 yards or more, but they didi it by throwing into the Miami Dime cdefense of 6 defensive backs, with no interceptions and their reciver not only catching it, but soemhow all 6 tacklers miss him. Soon, it was Miami 36, Syracuse 33, Miami defense then took control, and with 1:30 left, Miami led 57-39. suddenly, Syracuse scored on 4th and 15 on a 85 yard pass. Then they recovered the onside kick and scored on two 35 yard passes. Unfortunately the Tooth Fairy was not their savior, and their pitiful attempt to be galvanized failed. By the way, hey Miami, stop running the fucking football, you cant run, you suck at it, why run when nobody has fucking stopped your passing? Hell, our fat-ass doped-up, stoned, smashed, 500 lb editors here at Dynasties run better than your backs do.
"ONCE AGAIN WOLVERINES LOSE TO A BIRD, FANS WANT NON-FAGGY, JUST PLAIN OLD *WOLF* TO BE NEW TEAM NAME"
Stanford: 68
Michigan: 57
We Said: Michigan
Stanford wins! How can a team which beats Stanford is every signle damn category lose? Easy. They let Stanford score in 3 plays or less 7 times. Obviously michigan needs to learn how to play defense, mix up their play calling, and win some fucking games! Stanford is the crappiest excuse for an "institution of higher education". But, gthey pull this one off. Our new nickname for michigan: "The prostitutes", because, hey, its so easy to abuse them for the low cost of 30 minutes.
Week 7 Predictions!
1-Pitt
vs
4-ND
We Say: Pitt 29, ND 28
Irish forced to join Alcoholics Anonymous in 4th quarter.
3-Miami
vs
Clemson
We Say: Miami 6, Clemson 3
Hurricane Hugo, anyone?
Texas AM
vs
Stanford
We Say: TAM 43, Stan 33
The Aggies vs The Cardinal, sounds like Wrestlemania sub-par tag team jobbers.
Colorado
vs
Michigan
We Say: Mich 77, Colo 73
Newly changed Wolves bark louder, upset Buffs.
Week 6 Record: 2-2
Season: 2-2
DYNASTIES!: BECAUSE WHO SAYS SPORTS HAVE TO BE PC.
Message Edited on 04/17/02 12:54PM by UMAggiesJJ
Message Edited on 04/17/02 01:04PM by UMAggiesJJ
Posted On 04/17/02 03:41AM
Week 6 in Review!
-How did Pitt and Kansas squeeze out wins?
-Feisty Syracuse battles to the end.
-The....the....Cardinal w- wo- wo- wo.....
Week 6 was basically a regular week. Crazy things happened. There was a last second 4th down flop pass, a team which was down by 18 twice, came back twice, and still lost, a game where 59 points were scored in the 3rd quarter, 58 were scored in the first half, and only 8 were scored in the 4th, and lastly a game which featured so many turnovers, bad play calls, and missed opportunities, we thought it was CSPAN's repeat of Election 2000.
"CARDIAC CATS FROM NORTH GET HEART TRANSPLANT BEFORE CARDIAC CATS FROM SOUTH, LINCOLN CHEERS"
1-Pitt: 17
Clemson: 13
We Said: Pitt
As firsthand spectators to this game, we expected pitt to be able to control the clemson offense and take advanatage of the speed-problems and holes in the clemson defense to muster a sufficient vicotry. Pitt, however made this win harder than doing a rhomboid binary function. In a 7-7 game nearing hlaf, Pitt elects not to kick a FG. Clemson repeated 4th down attempts dididnt hlep their cause either. In the end the tigers were reduced to being raped by a group of albino panthers. Down 13-10 with no time left, they *went for the win* from 15 yards out rather then settle for the automatic tie to keep their top ranking. And we thought Gerald Ford was the dumb...
"HE WHO'S SHIT WEIGHS MORE, LAUGHS LAST, LOSES TOO."
2-Kansas: 40
4-Colorado: 39
We Said: Colorado
This one started with Kansas leading buffaloes in a herd to the slaughter with the precision of an american cowboy. With the score 22-7 in the 2nd the buffaloes realized that yes, they outweigh a jawhawk by more then the 3 pounds the jayhawaks originally convinved them, and they rebeled. Colo took a 29-22 lead in the 3rd, picked off Kansas at midfield, and was poised to end the game. And then, those fucking birds launched their dive-bombing attack, their defense shitting on every Colo attempt to score. Kansas led 40-29, and picked Colo off twice in a row. Only 2 minutes were left.
Wait, NO GAME is a Colorado game unless Colorado shows us once again how they can score 50 points in a 1 minute span. They scored, and it was 40-37. The Buffdaloes had finally figured out that buffalo shit, indeed, was much larger than jayhawk shit. However, those birds would get the last shit. They took a safety with 15 seconds left, and Colorado ran outta time. Buffalo Wings, anyone?
"EATING AN ORANGE FROM NEW YORK IS *ASKING* FOR A NATURAL DISASTER..."
3-Miami: 57
Syracuse: 51
We Said: Miami
At the end of the 1st, Miami led 29-8. And then in something you might expect in Babylon 5 episode, Syravcuse reverted to a more boring, unsophistocated, predictable offense then dripping water: They used 1 play. They also went for every 4th down. Result: Not only did they get 4 scores of 80 yards or more, but they didi it by throwing into the Miami Dime cdefense of 6 defensive backs, with no interceptions and their reciver not only catching it, but soemhow all 6 tacklers miss him. Soon, it was Miami 36, Syracuse 33, Miami defense then took control, and with 1:30 left, Miami led 57-39. suddenly, Syracuse scored on 4th and 15 on a 85 yard pass. Then they recovered the onside kick and scored on two 35 yard passes. Unfortunately the Tooth Fairy was not their savior, and their pitiful attempt to be galvanized failed. By the way, hey Miami, stop running the fucking football, you cant run, you suck at it, why run when nobody has fucking stopped your passing? Hell, our fat-ass doped-up, stoned, smashed, 500 lb editors here at Dynasties run better than your backs do.
"ONCE AGAIN WOLVERINES LOSE TO A BIRD, FANS WANT NON-FAGGY, JUST PLAIN OLD *WOLF* TO BE NEW TEAM NAME"
Stanford: 68
Michigan: 57
We Said: Michigan
Stanford wins! How can a team which beats Stanford is every signle damn category lose? Easy. They let Stanford score in 3 plays or less 7 times. Obviously michigan needs to learn how to play defense, mix up their play calling, and win some fucking games! Stanford is the crappiest excuse for an "institution of higher education". But, gthey pull this one off. Our new nickname for michigan: "The prostitutes", because, hey, its so easy to abuse them for the low cost of 30 minutes.
Week 7 Predictions!
1-Pitt
vs
4-ND
We Say: Pitt 29, ND 28
Irish forced to join Alcoholics Anonymous in 4th quarter.
3-Miami
vs
Clemson
We Say: Miami 6, Clemson 3
Hurricane Hugo, anyone?
Texas AM
vs
Stanford
We Say: TAM 43, Stan 33
The Aggies vs The Cardinal, sounds like Wrestlemania sub-par tag team jobbers.
Colorado
vs
Michigan
We Say: Mich 77, Colo 73
Newly changed Wolves bark louder, upset Buffs.
Week 6 Record: 2-2
Season: 2-2
DYNASTIES!: BECAUSE WHO SAYS SPORTS HAVE TO BE PC.
Message Edited on 04/17/02 12:54PM by UMAggiesJJ
Message Edited on 04/17/02 01:04PM by UMAggiesJJ